Time

"The Lord is faithful to all his promises and loving toward all he has made." - Psalm 145:13b

Faithful.

I have tried as best as I can to live up to every word and promise that I have made, but as you would have guessed, often times I failed.

Just today, I told my girlfriend I'll be at her place at around 1 or 2 in the afternoon to drop by the notes she needed for her exam. 1 o'clock...2...3...4...I'm still at work. Regardless of the validity or stupidity of my excuse for being late, it all boils down to me not being faithful to the promise that I just made.

I am at a point in my life where I'm lost, confused, troubled, uncertain, afraid. Deep inside my heart cries out to God, asking Him why I'm in this place, why I'm in this situation, is there a better way, will this ever come to an end...an endless stream of questions that I feel the Lord has been very silent to answer.

But in a very painstaking way, the Lord reminded of this word that had seemingly lost its deeper sense to me - faithful. More so, He has reminded me of this truth - I am faithful.

My fondest memories of God's perfect timing are those moments that something very precious to me, or something really necessary, is all of a sudden taken away from me. And what a better time to entertain thoughts of bitterness and resentment towards the Lord. But the Lord, in His perfect timing, replaces all these things with those that are more precious and that reflect the magnitude of His goodness. He is an abundant God, and He blesses according to His riches and kindness.

I would admit that I am still having a hard time coping with the fact that I just have to trust in the Lord. I feel very uncomfortable thinking that the questions that I have could just probably be left unanswered. But in so far as my God is concerned, His perfect time to answer those questions is the time when everything will fall into place, according to His pleasing and perfect will. And when this time comes, I can fully appreciate His kindness, His goodness, and His love.