Having what I already once lost

Pounds, that's what I'm talking about. I just want to throw it out there at this point that I'm being weight-conscious because of my health. I've seen so many older men and women who gained weight in their early 20's and it never stopped from there, and this brought out a whole chain of health problems. Also to throw it out there, I'm becoming more conscious about my diet because within the past year, my cholesterol level went up to what can now be considered as "high."

As you might know, I did get really sick the past week (not because of my weight but of a viral infection). It amazes me how there's a silver lining at the end of every dark cloud...I lost so much weight when I got sick, 11 pounds to be exact. All in a week! And the more important thing is that I started eating in smaller portions, just because I got used to it already.

You might also know about my food binge this past Saturday, and continuously over the weekend, I've been eating like crazy (well not really, just in the same way as I was eating before I got sick). In 2 days, I gained more or less 6 lbs.

To be fair to myself, it's not that I really ate that much food, but it's just that I easily gain weight but hardly lose them (doesn't that go for everyone else?).

Right now, I don't feel all-too-digestively well, probably because of my terribly erratic eating habits. I always had caramel sundae whenever I'd have an upset stomach or what not, and maybe I should have had that for lunch instead. It has always worked for me.

Now I'm back to eating very little, just because my stomach can't handle that much food anymore as it used to (except for last night's adobo spree, woo-hoo!). Maybe I'd lose weight again, but more importantly, be able to establish a diet that would be stably healthy for me.

Day with the Lord/Church Sunday

Today, I had to play at the Sunday service in Chino Hills, only that I had to be there way earlier than I'm used to (I had to be there at 8am, an hour before service, and I used to go there at 10). It was difficult waking up because my sleep regimen worked - it was raining and was really cold last night, so I thought of stuffing myself with so much food that I fell asleep immediately (something I'm not used to).

It takes me about half an hour to get there, and I woke up at 7:45 today! It's a good thing I had stuff prepared from last night, which I usually don't do, so it didn't take much time before I was ready to leave.

The other unfortunate thing today was it was still raining, which made it very difficult to drive. And so my travel time of 30 minutes took longer. But anyway I got there safe and sound, which is the important thing.

The other challenge I had today was that from Chino Hills, I had to be in Irvine by 11am - which was about an hour's drive. If I take the toll road, it would take me about 45 minutes. The only thing is that today, and only today, the 91 freeway which leads to the toll road is closed (talk about coincidence) and so I had to take the longer route. The service at Chino Hills ended at 10:15, and I even had to stop to get gas. After that, I was already on the freeway, when I suddenly realized my back door was open, also the gas tank! Geez, I had to move towards the shoulder amidst the speeding cars and the heavy rains. But to cut the long story short, I was fortunate enough to make it to Irvine on time (well, almost. I was just a few minutes late, and didn't miss much).

I loved today's service because they sang one of the praise songs that I love most. The chorus goes:

He knows my name
He knows my every thought
He sees each tear that falls
and He hears me when I call

What gets me really emotional about this song is that I suddenly thing about all the hardships, all the heartaches and pains, and I just think about how fortunate I am to have a God and a Father that is close enough to know my pain, and to feel it too; that I am fortunate to have a God and a Father who knows my unspoken dreams, desires and ambitions; that I am fortunate to have a God and a Father who listens to all the things that I say, whether sensinble or senseless - and is able to lovingly correct me with all my faults.

The rest of the day has been very emotional to me, but behind all that, I have a God and a Father who's always there for me. I'd end this with the verses of the song:

I have a Maker
He formed my heart
Before even time began
My life was in His hands

I have a Father
He calls me His own
He'll never leave me
No matter where I go

Good Day

I woke up early today, with the necessity of practicing for a wedding that I was to play for in the afternoon. I had to put in a lot more effort because there were songs that I had no idea how they sounded like, and yet all I had were music sheets with no chords whatsoever. Plus some of the songs that were familiar to me were also challenging, so I really had to practice.

I didn't have enough time in the morning though because I needed to go to school. I was trying to add a Psychology class at 9:00 am, plus I didn't have add cards at hand which meant I just really had to be there a lot earlier.

By God's grace, I did get the subject I was trying to add, and more than that...my teacher is a babe! Haha, I told my girlfriend and she's cool about it. My teacher does not require attendance, although she gives a point for every class meeting you attend, but as I told CJ, even if I'm not required to be in class, now I'd be more eager to wake up and go to school on a Saturday morning. Cool

I had to proceed with registration during break, because today was the last day, so this prevented me from attending the whole duration of the class. Bummer. But anyway, there's still next week.

I did finish registration a little bit early though and I just decided to go straight to West Covina to have time to eat at a Filipino place. I ended up eating alone at Salo-Salo. I ordered their tocino breakfast, and it was good only that the rice had some taste of both vinegar and achara already, which I never liked, so that ruined the meal for me. Then I went straight to church where the wedding was, just had to make a stop to buy candy to take out the nasty achara and vinegar taste.

After the wedding, I went to CJ's to pick her up and go on an unplanned date. We ate at one of my newest favorite places - Asian Bistro - then had Cold Stone for me after, and red velvet cake for her.

Now I feel bloated, relaxed (the bloated feeling compounded by the cold weather). And so I'd say I fairly had a good day.

Worst Ever

It's been cliche for people to hear me say I'm sick, and that I have never been this sick as before, but truly nothing beats this week - I was knocked out for one whole week. No work, no school, no choir rehearsals - no nothing.

I believe it started when I caught my co-worker's virus. We share the same room at work, and she had stomach flu the past week. She wasn't feeling so well that she had to be off from work for 2 days. I even told my other co-worker that no matter how sick I am I have never been absent for 2 straight days. And so I thought.

Sad to say, I'm used to getting sick, but what has alarmed me this time is that none of my medicines were working for me, and that I constantly had fever for 5 straight days. Thanks to my girlfriend's family, I was able to get some antibiotics, and started drinking them this morning. I did check in with the doctor this morning, and she did say that I had some serious throat infection that did require me to take antibiotics.

Now I'm starting to feel better - something that I haven't felt for the whole week. Thank God for antibiotics and His healing hand.

Old and New

There's this great distance between where I came from and where I am right now.

As I'm watching a video of my relatives doing the Igorot dance, on my one hand I hold one of the newest blackberry models today.

I am simply amazed by how far we have come as a human race - Laptops that can connect wirelessly almost anywhere; phones that capture your every email and allows you to send them as well; financial systems that allow you to buy things that you cannot pay for immediately; church services that use every bit of technological innovation imaginable - indeed, we have com a long, long way.

Fact: I know how to do the Igorot dance. I remember my relatives having so much fun watching me as a kid do this dance. I remember the cold weather I rarely experience in the Philippines but is always present whenever I vist our province. I remember the food, the warmth of family, the comfort of home - my true home.

I am very grateful for all the blessings that the Lord has given to me throughout my entire life. There's this part of me though, that misses my home, my roots, my childhood - and I guess I'd forever long for my life in the past. There's this great sense of longing to retire back to the province, to the food, to the warmth of family, and to the simplicity of life.

The hopeful side of me wishes that one day, I can go back and experience all these - and not just go back home, but to go back in that point in time. When reality strikes me, however, I do recognize that no one can travel back through time.

I guess amidst the hustle and bustle of today's world, and of my life - I just long for that serenity and peace. And I know that even though I can't go back in time, this peace - I can experience through Him.